Sivilay "Bruce" Sengkeophainh

Born in Lao People's Democratic Republic on October 8, 1970.

 

HIS FATHER WAS MANY SENGKEOPHAINH AND MOTHER SOUAY PHIMASAN-SENGKEOPHAINH. SIVILAY WAS THE 3rd OF 5 CHILDREN BORN TO MANY & SOUAY.

 

KEOVINGXAY SENGKEOPHAINH (XAY) WAS THE ELDEST CHILD, THEN CAME ALONG PHETSAMAY SENGKEOPHAINH (PHET), THEN SIVILAY SENGKEOPHAINH (BRUCE), THEN DAOSAVAY (DAO) CAME NEXT, AND FINALLY OUTHAY SENGKEOPHAINH (LAT) WAS THE BABY OF THE FAMILY.

 

WHEN BRUCE WAS 10 YEARS OLD THE FAMILY GOT A SPONSOR FROM THE UNITED STATES AND WAS SPONSORED TO COME TO THE U.S. BY A FAMILY THAT LIVED IN BEXLEY, OHIO.

 

THIS BEGAN THE SAGA OF BRUCE'S LIFE HERE.

 

 

 

 

 

 

BRUCE WAS OFFICIALLY A LEGAL RESIDENT IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.

 

BRUCE HAS TOLD ME SO MANY TIMES, ABOUT HOW IN LAOS IT IS VERY TROPICAL, HUMID CLIMATE.  IT IS VERY HOT THERE ALL THE TIME.

 

WHEN HE CAME TO THE UNITED STATES IT WAS IN THE WINTER TIME AND THERE WAS SNOW ON THE GROUND AND THEY WERE SO AMAZED ( AND  COLD ) THEY HAD NEVER SEEN SNOW BEFORE.

 

THEY HAD NEVER SEEN ALOT OF THINGS THAT WE TAKE FOR GRANTED HERE IN THE UNITED STATES.  GRANTED IT WAS 1980 BUT, THEY LIVED ON FARMING LAND IN LAOS AND PROBABLY HADN'T EVER BEEN ANYWHERE THAT HAD ELECTRICITY, OR RUNNING WATER.

 

SO COMING HERE NOT SPEAKING, READING , OR WRITING A BIT OF ENGLISH WAS A VERY TOUGH DECISION FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY, AND I COULD NOT IMAGINE LEAVING EVERYTHING I KNEW AND LOVED TO GO TO A COUNTRY WHERE I KNEW NO ONE AND COULD NOT EVEN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE .I KNOW THAT HAD TO BE THE BEST AND WORST DAY OF THEIR LIVES. 

 

UPON COMING TO THE UNITED STATES THE FAMILY THAT SPONSORED THEM TO COME HERE SET THEM UP WITH A HOUSE TO LIVE IN. MANY AND SOUAY STARTED TAKING SOME CLASSES TO LEARN HOW TO SPEAK, READ & WRITE ENGLISH. 

 

 

 

 

  I HAD PREVIOUSLY WENT TO SCHOOL WITH BRUCE AT BEERY MIDDLE SCHOOL, WE WERE IN LIKE THE 8th GRADE, BUT I MOVED AWAY & HE MOVED AWAY  THAT YEAR ALSO.

 

  WHEN I WAS IN 11th GRADE I LIVED BACK ON THE SOUTH SIDE OF TOWN. I WAS DRIVING TO THE  STORE & A FRIEND OF MINE THAT WAS RIDING IN THE CAR WITH ME SAID STOP RIGHT HERE, I SEE MY FRIEND. SO WE STOPPED AND BRUCE WAS HANGING OUT THE TRUNK OF HIS CAR FIXING HIS RADIO, BRUCE CAME OVER TO THE CAR AND TALKED TO US AND KEPT ASKING ME TO GO ON A DATE & I JUST TOLD HIM I WOULD SOME OTHER TIME (I REALLY DIDN'T WANT TO GO OUT WITH HIM), BUT MY FRIEND GAVE HIM MY PHONE NUMBER AND HE CALLED ME A FEW DAYS LATER .

 

BRUCE WAS A CHARMER AND I JUST COULDN'T RESIST HIM ONCE I STARTED TALKING TO HIM.

 

ANYTIME ANYONE ASKED HOW WE MEET BRUCE ALWAYS TOLD THEM I FOUND HIM IN THE TRUNK OF A CAR.

 

 

   BRUCE CAME TO PICK ME UP FOR OUR FIRST DATE. WE WERE GOING TO THE MOVIES AT EASTLAND MALL.

 

  WE WERE WALKING THRU EASTLAND MALL HOLDING HANDS AND TALKING, WE PASSED TWO GIRLS WALKING IN THE MALL AND AS WE DID BRUCE LET OUT THIS HUGE FART AND SAID " OH MY GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST DID THAT" I WAS SO EMBARASSED THAT HE TRIED TO BLAM THAT ON ME. I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. THE TWO GIRLS STARTED LAUGHING, BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT IT WAS ME. I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT MOVIE WE WENT TO SEE BUT I WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT DAY FOR AS LONG AS I LIVE, I WILL ALWAYS REMEMBER HIM TRYING TO EMBARASS ME.

 

          I SAID I WAS NOT EVER GOING TO GO OUT WITH HIM AGAIN.

 

BUT LIKE I SAID BEFORE BRUCE WAS A CHARMER AND WE DID GO OUT AGAIN.

 

                            THIS BEGAN MY LIFE WITH BRUCE.

    JULIE MARIE ELLIOTT WAS BORN ON THIS DAY AT 3:55am, SHE WEIGHED 4 LBS AND 2 OZS AND WAS 17 INCHES LONG. JULIE WAS BORN 2 MONTHS EARLY AT MOUNT CARMEL HOSPITAL AND HAD TO STAY IN THE HOSPITAL FOR AWHILE. SHE IS DADDY'S ONLY LITTLE GIRL SO SHE HAD A VERY SPECIAL PLACE IN HIS HEART. SHE IS DADDY'S LITTLE BEAUTY QUEEN.

 

JULIE WAS THE CUTEST BABY IN THE NURSERY. ALL THE OTHER BABY'S WERE UGLY.

 

AS SHE HAS GROWN UP JULIE IS SO MUCH LIKE HER DAD. THAT SOUNDS FUNNY TO SAY BUT, SHE HAS THAT GOOFY, FUNNY ATTITUDE THAT BRUCE HAD. JULIE ALSO HAS THE NEED TO BE ON THE GO, ALL THE TIME. SHE HAS A THING FOR WANTING TO KEEP THE ROADS HOT, JUST LIKE BRUCE DID. I DON'T KNOW OF ANYTIME HE DIDN'T WANT TO BE OUT AND DRIVING AROUND SEEING NEW THINGS. HE LOVED TO BE IN HIS CAR, JUST DRIVING, AS DOES JULIE.

THIS WAS THE DAY THAT BRANDON JAMES SENGKEOPHAINH WAS BORN, HE CAME INTO THIS WORLD AT 12:09 AM AT RIVERSIDE HOSPITAL. BRANDON WEIGHED 6 LBS AND 13 OZS AND WAS 19 INCHES LONG. HE WAS DADDY'S FIRST LITTLE BOY, AND THE SERIOUS ARTIST OF THE FAMILY.

 

WHEN I WAS PREGNANT FOR BRANDON I DID NOT KNOW WHAT HE WAS GOING TO BE A BOY OR A GIRL. I HAD SEVERAL ULTRASOUNDS BUT  NOT LUCK IN SEEING ANYTHING THAT MIGHT GIVE ME A CLUE. EVERYBODY WANTED ME TO HAVE A GIRL, AND AT MY BABY SHOWER EVERYONE EXCEPT MY GRANDMOTHER BOUGHT GIRLS CLOTHING,(THEY WERE CONVINCED HE WAS A GIRL), WELL HE SURPRISED EVERYBODY. AND I HAD TO EXCHANGE ALL THOSE CLOTHES. I HAD PICKED OUT "BRANDON JAMES" FOR A BOY AND "BRITTA ARIANA" FOR A GIRL (I WAS KINDA HOPING FOR A GIRL), AND WAS ALSO SURPRISED BY BRANDON.

 

BRANDON WAS THE CUTEST BABY IN THE NURSERY, ALL THE OTHER BABIES WERE UGLY. 

 

SINCE BEING BORN BRANDON HAS TAKEN SO MUCH AFTER HIS DAD. BRANDON HAS BRUCE'S TALENT FOR ART AND HIS SAME GOOFY ATTITUDE, AND JOY FOR LIFE, AND LOOKING SO MUCH LIKE HIS DAD. BRANDON DOESN'T HAVE THE LOVE FOR FISHING LIKE BRUCE DID, BUT HE HAS THE LOVE FOR BILLIARDS THAT BRUCE HAD.

 

 

 

 

THIS WAS THE DAY THAT JOSHUA SHAWN ELLIOT WAS BORN AT 11:39am AT MOUNT CARMEL HOSPITAL.JOSH WEIGHED 6 LBS AND 12 OZS AND WAS 19 INCHES LONG. HE WAS DADDY'S LITTLE COMPUTER WHIZ.

 

JOSHUA WAS THE CUTEST BABY IN THE NURSERY, ALL THE OTHER BABIES WERE UGLY.

 

JOSH HAS GROWN UP TO BE SUCH A GOOD LOOKING MAN. HE IS SO QUIET AND LAID BACK. JOSH HAS SUCH A GOOD ATTITUDE ABOUT LIFE. JOSH ALSO HAS BRUCE'S LOVE FOR FISHING. ALL OF THE KIDS HAVE THE LOVE FOR CARS, JUST AS BRUCE DID. HE LOVED ALL KINDS OF CARS AS LONG AS THEY WENT FAST AND DREW ATTENTION.

THIS WAS THE DAY THAT JUSTIN DON RAY ELLIOTT WAS BORN AT MOUNT CARMEL HOSPITAL AT 9:55 pm. JUSTIN WEIGHED 6 LBS AND 14 OZS AND WAS 19 INCHES LONG. HE IS DADDY'S LITTLE COMPUTER HACKER.

 

JUSTIN WAS THE CUTEST BABY IN THE NURSERY. ALL THE OTHER BABYS WERE UGLY.

 

AS JUSTIN HAS GROWN INTO SUCH A HANDSOME LITTLE MAN, HE HAS TAKEN AFTER BRUCE'S LOOKS. JUSTIN HAS BRUCE'S LOVE FOR FISHING AND IS SUCH A KIND HEARTED PERSON,AS WAS BRUCE. YOU CAN JUST LOOK AT HIM AND TELL HE HAS THE SWEETEST PERSONALITY.   

THIS WAS THE DAY THAT CAMERON JOSEPH SENGKEOPHAINH WAS BORN. HE CAME INTO THIS WORLD AT 1:18AM AT RIVERSIDE HOSPITAL.CAMERON WEIGHED 6LBS AND 13OZS AND WAS 20 INCHES LONG. HE IS DADDY'S LITTLE INVENTOR.

 

WHEN I WAS 8 MONTHS PREGNANT WITH CAMERON I HAD AN ULTRASOUND DONE AND THEY TOLD US IT WAS DEFFINATELY A BOY. THE HOSPITAL WAS TRYING OUT SOMETHING NEW AND AS LONG AS YOU BROUGHT A TAPE YOU COULD HAVE YOUR ULTRASOUND VIDEO TAPED, SO I HAD CAMERON'S ULTRSOUND VIDEOTAPED AND WAS ABLE TO SHOW EVERYBOBY CAMERON BEFORE HE WAS BORN. IT WAS REALLY NICE, YOU COULD SEE HIM MOVING AND SMILING, AND YOU COULD SEE HIS HEARTBEATING.

 

SO I WAS PICKING OUT NAMES I HAD BEEN SEARCHING THRU BABY BOOKS AND BRANDON WANTED TO HELP SO HE FLIPPED THRU A BOOK AND PICKED OUT A GIRLS NAME AND I TOLD HIM HE COULDN'T GIVE HIS LITTLE BROTHER A GIRLS NAME, SO I GAVE HIM THE PART WITH BOYS NAMES AND HE POINTED TO CAMERON. WELL UNTIL AFTER CAMERON WAS BORN I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT MIDDLE NAME TO GIVE HIM. BRUCE LIKED JOSEPH AND MY MOM WANTED IT TO BE JUST JOE. SO AFTER I GAVE BIRTH THEY STOOD IN THE BIRTHING ROOM AND FLIPPED A COIN FOR THE NAME. NEEDLESS TO SAY BRUCE WON, WITH JOSEPH.

 

CAMERON WAS THE CUTEST BABY IN THE NURSERY. ALL THE OTHER BABY'S WERE UGLY.

 

SINCE BEING BORN CAMERON HAS TAKEN SO MUCH AFTER HIS DAD. CAMERON HAS BRUCE'S EYE FOR ART, AND TRYING TO INVENT THINGS THAT ALWAYS SEEMED TO HURT BRANDON WHEN HE TRIED THEM OUT. THERE HAS BEEN ALOT OF VISITS TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM, BECAUSE OF CAMERON'S INVENTIONS. CAMERON HAS BRUCE'S LOVE FOR FISHING AND BILLIARDS.

I DON'T REMEMBER IF THIS WAS ACTUALLY THE DATE OR NOT, BUT JOSH AND JUSTIN HAD CAME OVER TO VISIT AND THEY STAYED ALL NIGHT, WITH US. BRUCE WENT TO HIS MOM'S TO GET SOMETHING SO WE COULD COOK THE NEXT DAY (PROBABLY HOT PEPPERS). WHILE BRUCE WAS GONE, BRANDON, CAMERON, JOSH & JUSTIN  ALL DECIDE TO PLAY A GAME OF HIDE & SEEK IN THE HOUSE.

I THINK CAMERON WAS RUNNING FROM JOSH HE TRIED TO NOT GET TAGGED BY HIM AND JUMPED BACK INTO THE WALL AND BUSTED A HOLE IN THE WALL WITH HIS BODY (IT WAS A REALLY BIG HOLE). OH MY GOD THEY WERE ALL SO SCARED THEY THOUGHT THEY WERE GOING TO GET IN TROUBLE. SO I WAITED UNTIL BRUCE GOT BACK SO HE COULD TAKE CARE OF IT (I DIDN'T WANT TO  BE THE BAD PERSON IF ANYBODY GOT IN TROUBLE).

HE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING, HE THOUGHT IT WAS SO FUNNY. HE SAID THERE IS NO WAY THEY BUSTED THAT HOLE WITH THEIR LITTLE BODIES. SO NOBODY GOT IN TROUBLE (WHICH WAS GOOD).

I TOOK BRUCE TO HIS FAVORITE BILLIARDS STORE TO LOOK FOR A VALENTINES DAY PRESENT FOR HIM (WHICH HE DIDN'T KNOW)... A NEW CUE STICK... HE HAD MENTIONED THAT SOMETHING WAS WRONG WITH HIS SO I WAS GOING TO SURPRISE HIM . I TOOK HIM WITH ME TO GET SOME KIND OF IDEA OF WHAT KIND OF  STICKS HE LIKED IN THE STORE, SO I COULD GO BACK AND GET IT LATER ON....

 

WHEN WE GOT THERE, WE LOOKED FOREVER AT THERE INVENTORY AND I KEPT PICKING UP SOME AND SAYING OHH I LIKE THIS ONE, I SHOULD GET ME A NEW STICK, YOU NEED TO HELP ME PICK ONE OUT..(HE NEVER SUSPECTED A THING)..

 

WELL WE STARTED TALKING TO HIS FRIEND THAT WORKED THERE AND, SOMEONE CAME IN TO BUY SOMETHING AND HE TALKED TO THEM FOR A MINUTE AND SAID OHH THAT WAS MY OLD STUDENT, AT THE KARATE DOJO DOWN THE ROAD.... WELL BRUCE WANTED TO KNOW MORE, BECAUSE HE HAD WANTED TO PUT THE BOYS IN MARTIAL ARTS, BUT HADN'T FOUND A SCHOOL THAT HE LIKED YET... HE WANTED TO PUT THEM IN MUAY THAI, BUT AFTER GOING TO PREVIEW A CLASS HE SAID NO NO NO THAT IS TOO DANGEROUS, AND THEY COULD GET HURT REALLY BAD....(THEY WERE RUFF AS HELL)...

 

SO HE TOLD US ABOUT HIS SCHOOL, WE WENT TO CHECK IT OUT AND HAVE BEEN ENROLLED IN THE SCHOOL EVER SINCE.....

 

SOUTHWEST MARTIAL ARTS - U.S.A.TRAINING CENTER

 

 

BRUCE AND I TOOK THE KIDS TO NEW ORLEANS, LOUISIANA, FOR A KARATE TOURNAMENT. THE KIDS WERE SO EXCITED ABOUT GOING.

 

WE SAVED FOR 6 MONTHS SO WE WOULD HAVE EXTRA MONEY TO DO A LOT OF THINGS WHILE WE WERE THERE, BRUCE WANTED THIS TO BE VERY MEMORABLE FOR THE KIDS.

 

WE LEFT OUT A COUPLE OF DAYS EARLY FOR THE COMPETITION SO WE WOULD GET THERE AND HAVE PLENTY OF TIME TO ENJOY OURSELVES BEFORE THE CHAOS STARTED WITH THE TOURNAMENT.

 

WE GOT A HOTEL IN SLIDELL, LOISIANA (THATS WHERE THE TOURNAMENT WAS), BUT WE WERE ABOUT A 15 MINUTE DRIVE TO NEW ORLEANS.

 

I REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE ALMOST AT OUR HOTEL, WE WENT OVER THIS BRIDGE THAT WENT WAY UP INTO THE AIR AND STRECHED FOR ABOUT 4 MILES (I THINK) I WAS TELLING THE KIDS LOOK THERE IS THE OCEAN LOOK HOW FAR IT GOES OUT, YOU COULD SEE SOME REALLY PRETTY SAILBOATS AND ALL KINDS OF PEOPLE ON JET SKIS, WHEN WE GOT TO THE OTHER SIDE THERE WAS A SIGN THAT SAID YOU JUST CROSSED LAKE PONCHATRAIN.... WHAT THE HELL I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE GULF OF MEXICO AND IT WAS A LAKE. (WELL THE WATER COMES FROM THE GULF OF MEXICO, BUT IT WAS A  LAKE... A HUGE ASS LAKE).

 

WE WENT ON A WALK OF DOWNTOWN NEW ORLEANS DURING THE DAY TIME IT REALLY IS A BEAUTIFUL PLACE. BUT ONCE THE SUN GOES DOWN IT IS A REALLY CRAZY PLACE TO GO.

 

WE WENT TO BOURBON STREET DURING THE DAY AND LOOKED AROUND IT WAS NICE OVER THERE. SO WE DECIDED TO TAKE THE KIDS BACK AT NIGHT SO THEY COULD SEE WHAT THE HYPE WAS ALL ABOUT. WE GOT THERE AND FOUND A PARKING GARAGE AND WALKED DOWN AND FOUND A PLACE FOR SOME OF US TO EAT AT, WHILE THE REST OF US WALKED TO BOURBON STREET. THERE WAS BRUCE, ME (JO), BRYANT, TINA, SENSEI SCOTT, COLLIN, CAMERON, BRANDON & MATT AND KIM (FROM KARATE).

 

THERE WAS ALOT OF PEOPLE THERE ESPECIALLY SEEING THAT IT WAS A WEEKDAY IN THE MIDDLE OF JULY. WE WERE AMAZED THAT THERE WERE SO MANY PEOPLE. THE KIDS WERE AMAZED THAT THERE WERE GIRLS UP ON THE BALCONIES FLASHING THERE BOOBS AT THEM. SO THEY THREW SOME BEADS TO GET MORE PEAKS, BUT SOMETIMES IT DIDN'T WORK, THE GIRLS SAID THEY WERE TOO YOUNG TO BE THERE.

 

CAMERON DECIDED TO HE WANTED BEADS SO BRUCE TOLD HIM TO FLASH THEM HIS BOOBS AND HE DID AND SOME LADY THREW HIM SOME BEADS (HE WAS SO PROUD).

 

THERE WAS THIS LADY ON THE BALCONY SHE HAD DOLLY PARTON BOOBS AND SHE KEPT HOLLERING AT BRYANT, SO I THREW HER SOME BEADS SO SHE WOULD FLASH HIM (TINA WAS REALLY PISSED OFF. I THINK SHE WANTED TO KNOCK HER OFF THE BALCONY).

 

WE WENT TO THE SWAMP AND WENT ON A SWAMP TOUR WHILE WE WERE THERE ALSO. EVERYBODY HAD SO MUCH FUN, AND IT WAS REALLY COOL TO SEE THE ALLIGATORS THAT CLOSE UP. MATT ACTUALLY REACH OFF THE BOAT AND GRABBED ONE OF THE GATORS TAIL (IT WAS AMAZING THAT ALL HE DID WAS SWIM AWAY).

 

WELL THE DAY CAME FOR US TO LEAVE. BRUCE,BRANDON & CAMERON DIDN'T WANT TO GO HOME (NEITHER DID I) BUT WE COULDN'T JUST MOVE THERE WITH NO JOBS. 

 

SOMETIMES I WISH MAYBE WE DID MOVE THERE..... MAYBE BRUCE WOULD STILL BE ALIVE.....

Passed away on August 5, 2005. Well this was the worse day of my life... I got up feeling that something was not right because Bruce was not at home, I would never have imagined that he would never be coming home ever again.

 

I WENT TO WORK AND WAITED TO HEAR FROM HIM, I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT HAD HAPPENED. I JUST THOUGHT THAT HE WOULD CALL ME AND TELL ME HE BROKE DOWN OR SOMETHING,.....

 

I TRIED TO CALL HIS CELL PHONE WITH NO ANSWER ALL MORNING. I WAS ACTUALLY STARTING TO GET MAD AT HIM.

 

 I GOT A CALL FROM MY AUNT THAT SHE SAW SOMETHING ON THE NEWS ABOUT SOMEONE DYING IN GROVE CITY AND IT WAS AN ASIAN MAN. I REALLY STARTED TO FREAK OUT AND STARTED CALLING EVERYONE I KNEW.

 

 I CALLED HIS BOSS AND HE TOLD ME HE HADN'T BEEN TO WORK THAT DAY, AND HADN'T CALLED HIM TO LET HIM KNOW ANYTHING, AND THAT WAS NOT BRUCE, HE KNEW HE HAD TO OPEN UP THE SHOP.

 

I GOT A CALL AROUND 11AM AT WORK THAT DAY, FROM MY BROTHER AND SISTER-IN-LAW THAT A DETECTIVE HAD BEEN TO THERE HOUSE  LOOKING FOR ME, AND THEY HAD BRUCE'S DRIVERS LICENSE.

 

 I REALLY FREAKED OUT WHEN MY SISTER-IN-LAW TOLD ME SHE SAW A CAR LIKE BRUCE'S CAR AT THE CRIME SCENE OF A MURDER INVESTIGATION ON THE NEWS EARLY THAT MORNING, BUT JUST DIDN'T PUT IT TOGETHER UNTIL, THE DETECTIVE SHOWED UP.

 

I RAN OUT OF WORK I WAS GOING TO FIND BRUCE AND I WENT HOME JUST TO SEE IF HE MIGHT BE HOME BY THAT TIME, AND FOUND A CARD FROM A DETECTIVE ON MY FRONT DOOR TELLING ME TO CALL HIM AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, IT WAS URGENT THAT HE REACH ME.

 

WHEN I READ THAT I DIDN'T HAVE TO BE TOLD HE WAS GONE, I THINK I ALREADY KNEW BY THIS POINT, IT JUST HADN'T SANK IN. I THINK I WANTED TO PROVE THAT IT  WASN'T HIM, I DIDN'T WANT TO BELIEVE IT WAS BRUCE......

 

I JUST WANTED TO BE SURE SO I WAS FRANTICALLY TRYING TO FIND THE NEWS ARTICLE ON THE INTERNET SO I COULD SEE THE CAR MY SISTER-IN-LAW WAS TALKING ABOUT. I WASN'T GOING TO  BELIEVE IT WAS HIS CAR UNTIL I SAW IT FOR MY SELF.

 

 I WILL REMEMBER THAT DAY FOREVER.

AUGUST 5, 2005

THIS WAS THE DAY MY LIFE WAS TORN APART, AND I LOST MY BABY, AND I WILL NEVER GET HIM BACK.....

 

 

 

 

WELL TODAY WAS YOUR 35th BIRTHDAY, I MADE A WISH ON YOUR CANDLES, THAT THIS WAS SOME KIND OF NIGHTMARE AND I WOULD WAKE UP AND FIND YOU HERE BESIDE ME.

BUT THAT WILL NEVER HAPPEN. I MISS YOU SO MUCH......

I CELEBRATED YOUR BIRTHDAY WITH THE KIDS TODAY, THEY MISS YOU SO MUCH, AND SO DO I.

NOT ONLY WAS TODAY BRUCES' BIRTHDAY, BUT TODAY THE DETECTIVE WORKING THE CASE CALLED ME AND WANTED TO COME AND FILL ME IN ON SOME OF THE DETAILS OF THE CASE, SO I CAN GET SOME KIND OF INFORMATION ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED.

WHEN HE GOT TO THE HOUSE HE GAVE ME INFORMATION ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED, WHICH WASN'T VERY MUCH INFORMATION. HE COULDN'T TELL ME AWHOLE LOT BECAUSE THE CASE WOULD BE GOING TO COURT AND THE INCRIMINATING EVEIDENCE COULDN'T BE REVEALED UNTIL THEN.

SO I WILL BE IN THE DARK UNTIL WHO KNOWS WHEN, TO FIND OUT WHY SOMEONE WOULD DO THIS TO YOU....

THERE WOULD BE A COUPLE OF TIMES A YEAR WHEN BRUCE WOULD SURPRISE ME WITH ROSES, AND HE WOULD TRY NOT TO MAKE IT OBVIOUS, LIKE ALWAYS ON VALENTINES DAY OR MY BIRTHDAY, OR EVEN MOTHER'S DAY. HE ALWAYS TRIED TO DO SOMETHING TO SURPRISE ME.

 

WHEN BRUCE DIED LAST YEAR I NEVER EXPECTED A WHOLE LOT ON MOTHER'S DAY THIS YEAR WHEN IT ROLLED AROUND, BUT I GOT A GOOD SURPRISE..... BRANDON AND CAMERON TOOK ME OUT TO DINNER THAT DAY, IT WAS NOTHING EXTRAVAGANT, BUT IT WAS THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS.

 

WHILE WE WERE GONE I GOT A CALL THAT JULIE, JOSH & JUSTIN HAD LEFT ME SOMETHING AT THE HOUSE FOR MOTHER'S DAY, WHICH WAS A SURPRISE I HADN'T HAD THE PLEASURE OF SPENDING ALOT OF TIME WITH THEM OVER THE LAST FEW YEARS.

 

WHEN I GOT HOME THERE WAS 3 DOZEN RED & WHITE ROSES SITTING ON THE FRONT PORCH FOR ME, AND A MOTHER'S  DAY CARD FROM THEM.... IT WAS A TOTAL SHOCK I DIDN'T EXPECT THAT, AND THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT. I WAS VERY HAPPY THAT THEY THOUGHT ABOUT ME ON THAT DAY.

 

I HAVE NEVER KNOWN HOW THE KIDS REALLY FELT ABOUT ME AND THERE DAD BEING TOGETHER. I'M SURE THEY DIDN'T REALLY LIKE THE IDEA, I THINK MOST KIDS WANT THEIR MOM AND DAD TO BE TOGETHER, SO I NEVER REALLY TRIED TO PUSH MY PRESENCE ON THEM, BUT WE ALWAYS ENJOYED WHEN THEY CAME AROUND TO VISIT. THE BOYS WERE SO ACTIVE AND LIVE WHEN THEY CAME OVER, WHICH WAS GOOD TO SEE ALL OF THEM GETTING ALONG.

 

BRUCE WOULD BE SO PROUD TO SEE THAT ALL OF HIS KIDS ARE SPENDING TIME TOGETHER AND REALLY GETTING TO KNOW EACH OTHER. THEY ACT LIKE THEY HAVE NEVER BEEN APART FROM EACH OTHER.

 

THAT IS WHAT THIS MEMORIAL SITE IS FOR.

 

SO THAT BRUCE'S CHILDREN WILL NEVER FORGET HOW MUCH HE LOVED THEM.

 

WHEN I THINK ABOUT THE KIDS SPENDING TIME TOGETHER I SMILE BECAUSE I KNOW HE WOULD BE VERY HAPPY KNOWING THEY ARE TOGETHER FINALLY.

I WOULD LIKE TO THINK IF HE HAD A DYING WISH IT WOULD BE FOR ALL THE KIDS TO BE TOGETHER. I KNOW HE SMILES DOWN AND WATCHES THEM TOGETHER.

TODAY I WENT TO COURT FOR THE MAN INVOLVED IN BRUCES' MURDER.(HIS NAME IS NICKY JOHNSON.

THIS GUY DECIDED TO TAKE A PLEA BARGAIN FOR HIS INVOLVEMENT IN THE MURDER.

HE PLEAD GUILTY TO TAMPERING WITH EVIDENCE AND RECEIVED 4 YEARS FOR THAT CHARGE.

HE ALSO PLEAD GUILTY TO INVOLUNTARY MANSLAUGHTER AND RECEIVED 10 YEARS FOR THAT CHARGE.

HE HAS TO SERVE THEM CONSECUTIVELY, AND WILL HAVE NO CHANCE FOR PAROLL OR EARLY RELEASE.

DURING THE COURT PROCEEDINGS EVERYTHING WAS KEPT A SECRET, BECAUSE THERE WAS STILL ANOTHER TRIAL IN THE WORKS AND THE JUDGE DID NOT WANT ANY INFORMATION LEAKED OUT ABOUT THE PENDING TRIAL.

I WAS ABLE TO GET UP AND GIVE A VICTIM IMPACT STATEMENT, I WAS SO UPSET I COULD NOT READ PAST THE FIRST LINE. I HAD TO HAND IT TO THE VICTIM ADVOCATE AND HAVE HER READ IT FOR ME.

WHEN HE GOT UP AND GAVE HIS APOLOGY, I COULD NOT HEAR ANYTHING THAT HE SAID, SO I DON'T FEEL HE FELT ANY REMORSE FOR HIS ACTIONS. BUT HE HAS A LONG TIME TO THINK ABOUT WHAT HE DID AND ALL THE LIVES HE AFFECTED BY THIS SENSELESS ACT OF VIOLENCE COMMITTED UPON A MAN THAT NEVER EVEN TRIED TO FIGHT BACK OR DEFEND HISSELF.

ONE YEAR AGO YOU DIED AND STILL WE MOURN

 

ONE YEAR AGO YOU DIED AND STILL WE MOURN,

NOR WILL OUR MOURNING END TILL IT BE NIGHT,

EVEN AS TIME TURNS OUR TEARS TO LIGHT.

YEARS HENCE, WHEN THIS MAY BE MORE EASILY BORNE.

EACH MOMENT OF YOUR PASSION AND DELIGHT,

AS CLEAR AS SUNSHINE, BOUNTIFUL AND BRIGHT,

REMAINS OUR FORTUNE NOW THAT YOU ARE GONE.

 

 

 

 

THIS IS WHAT MY LIFE IS EVERYDAY WITHOUT OUT BRUCE IN IT. I MISS HIM SO MUCH, EVEN AFTER A YEAR HAS GONE BY, I STILL TALK ABOUT HIM AND THINK ABOUT HIM AS IF HE WERE STILL HERE.

IT IS VERY HARD FOR ME TO LET GO OF HIM.........

 

NOT A DAY GOES BY THAT I DON'T THINK OF YOU

 

NOT A DAY GOES BY THAT I DON'T THINK OF YOU.

THEY SAY I SHOULD MOVE ON, BUT TELL ME, WHERE?

WHERE SUCH LOVE AS I HAVE SHARED WITH YOU,

SUCH SWEETNESS FROM SUCH JOY SO MANY YEARS?

THERE HAS TO BE SOME ROOM FOR STORING SORROW,

SOME PLACE TO KEEP ONE'S UNDIVIDED PAIN,

WHERE PAST CAN STILL BE PRESENT, THOUGH IN SHADOW,

AND I CAN HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS AGAIN.

AH DARLING! WE WILL BE TOGETHER ALWAYS,

THOUGH YOU ARE DEAD, AND I LIVE ALONE.

TIME IS NOTHING BUT AN OPEN WINDOW

TO THINGS MORE REAL, WHICH YOU AND I HAVE KNOWN.

WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER, WE BECAME ONE FLESH;

SO NOW IN ME YOU'LL NOT RETURN TO DUST.

THE COURT TRIAL STARTED TODAY FOR THE FEMALE THAT WAS CHARGED IN THE MURDER OF BRUCE. (HER NAME IS CRYSTAL RILEY OR RIDLEY)

 

I HAVE NEVER HAD TO GO TO THE COURT HOUSE FOR ANYTHING OTHER THAN TRAFFIC COURT WITH BRUCE ONE TIME.

 

THIS WAS TOTALLY DIFFERENT THAT TRAFFIC COURT.

 

WHEN YOU GO TO THE FLOOR THAT THE JUDGES COURTROOMS ARE ON, IT IS SO DARK AND DREARY.

 

I WAS ALREADY DEPRESSED ABOUT BEING THERE, AND THAT SURROUNDINGS JUST DIDN'T MAKE ME FEEL ANY BETTER.

 

I HAD TO SIT OUTSIDE THE COURTROOM UNTIL I TESTIFIED BECAUSE THE PROSECUTORS, CALLED ME AS A WITNESS TO ESTABLISH A TIMELINE OF WHEN EVERYTHING HAPPENED, AND IF HE RETURNED HOME.

 

WELL THE ONLY THING THAT HAPPENED TODAY WAS JURY SELECTION AND EVERYTHING STARTS IN FULL SWING TOMORROW.

TODAY WAS ANOTHER DREARY , DEPRESSING TIME IN THE COURT ROOM WAITING AREA.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THEY KEEP THE WAITING AREA LIKE THIS. IT IS SO DEPRESSING. MAYBE TO KEEP EVERYBODY CALM BEFORE THEY GO IN TO SEE THE JUDGE. I DON'T KNOW BUT I HATE IT AND I KNOW I WOULD HATE TO WORK THERE.

WELL TODAY THERE WAS TESTIMONY STARTING. I DON'T KNOW WO TESTIFIED BEFORE ME, EXCEPT FOR NICK (BRUCE'S FRIEND). I THINK HE WAS THE FIRST PERSON TO GET UP ON THE STAND AND THEN ME (I THINK HE WAS THE ONLY ONE BEFORE ME).

WHEN IT WAS MY TURN, IT WAS SO DUMB FOR ME TO GET UP THERE, THEY ASKED ME QUESTIONS THAT I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND UNTIL LATER ON AT THE CLOSING ARGUMENTS THAT THIS STUPID DEFENSE ATTORNEY GAVE. ALSO QUESTIONS ABOUT BLOOD IN THE CAR AND WHEN BRUCE WAS HOME.

I HAD DECIDED I WAS GOING TO BE STRONG AND NOT SIT THERE AND CRY LIKE A BLUBBERING IDIOT, DURING THE WHOLE TRIAL (THE HARDEST THING WAS TO TRY AND KEEP FROM CRYING)

WHILE ON THE STAND THE PROSECUTORS HANDED ME A SMALL BOX AND THEY ASKED ME TO LOOK AT IT, WHEN I OPENED THE BOX IT HAD BRUCES CELL PHONE IN IT........I DIDN'T THINK I WOULD REACT THAT WAY, BUT I FELT SO LIGHT HEADED AND DIZZY AT THE SAME TIME AND I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO GET SICK......I STARTED CRYING, I JUST FELT LIKE THIS WAS ONE OF THE LAST THINGS THAT HE TOUCHED AND I DIDN'T WANT TO LET IT GO.

WHEN I SAW HIS CLOTHES AND SHOES THAT HE WAS WEARING THAT NIGHT I FELT THE SAME WAY, BUT I DIDN'T TOUCH THEM, ONE OF THE DETECTIVES HAD TO LOOK AND SEE IF IT WAS AS HE REMEMBERED THEM.

WELL WHEN I WENT HOME TODAY, EVEN THOUGH THE DAY ENDED EARLY I WAS EXHAUSTED (MENTALLY EXHAUSTED)

THIS WAS ANOTHER EARLY DAY AT COURT MORE TESTIMONY FROM PEOPLE, STATETING THAT THIS LADY WAS A LIAR AND COULD NOT BE BELIEVED.

THE BAD THING WAS THAT ALMOST EVERYONE THAT GOT ON THE WITNESS STAND WAS PEOPLE THAT KNEW THIS LADY PERSONALLY.

THE WHOLE TIME SHE SAT IN THAT COURTROOM SHE LOOKED AROUND AT PEOPLE, AND I CAUGHT HER LOOKING MY WAY A FEW TIMES, BUT SHE WAS EMOTIONLESS, SHE HAD NO KIND OF EXPRESSION ON HER FACE, SHE WAS JUST COLD.

WHEN THE CORONER GOT UP ON THE STAND TO DISCUSS THE EXTENT OF THE INJURIES INFLICTED ON BRUCE, SHE STILL SAT THERE, LIKE SHE HAD ICE FLOWING THRU HER VEINS.

I KNOW THAT I AM VERY CAPABLE OF SEEING THINGS WITHOUT BEING UPSET OR DISGUSTED, BUT I GOT A GLIMPSE OF A PHOTO THAT WAS A CLOSE UP OF BRUCE'S FACE AT THE CRIME SCENE, AND I LOST IT, I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA PUKE RIGHT THERE IN THE COURTROOM.

BRUCE DIDN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE BRUCE. I WAS SICKENED BY WHAT I SAW AT THE FUNERAL, BUT THAT DID NOT EVEN BEGIN TO PREPARE ME FOR THESE PHOTOS. I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT I SAW IT WAS HORRIFIC, AND I DON'T KNOW HOW ANYONE COULD SIT THERE AND LOOK AT THEM, MAYBE IT IS JUST I LOVED HIM, BUT THEY WERE AWFUL.

I AM SO GLAD NONE OF THE KIDS WERE HERE TO SEE THIS, OR EVEN HEAR THE THINGS BEING SAID ABOUT THE INJURIES.

TODAY WAS ANOTHER DAY OF LISTENING TO MY WORST NIGHTMARES COME TRUE.

I NEVER EVER WOULD HAVE IMAGINED THAT BRUCE WOULD HAVE DIED LIKE THIS, HE WAS EVERYBODIES FRIEND.... HE WAS LIKED BY SO MANY PEOPLE..... THERE WERE SO MANY PEOPLE THAT KNEW HIM AND WOULD HAVE DONE ANYTHING FOR HIM, THE SAME AS HE WOULD HAVE DONE FOR THEM ALSO. BRUCE WAS SUCH A FUN LOVING PERSON, AND I JUST COULDN'T BELIEVE HOW MANY PEOPLE THAT I DIDN'T KNOW THAT KNEW HIM.


I NOW KNOW ENTIRELY WAY TOO MUCH ABOUT THE WORKINGS OF THE JUDICIAL SYSTEM. AND THE COURTROOM PROCEEDINGS.

SITTING THRU THE TESTIMONIES OF THE WITNESSES,  DETECTIVES, FINGERPRINT EXPERTS, DNA EXPERTS AND ANY THE CORONER MAKES YOU FEEL SO COLD AND NUMB. ALOT OF THE PROCEEDINGS ALL I COULD DO WAS SIT AND CRY, WHILE LISTENING TO WHAT HORRIFIC THINGS HAPPENED TO BRUCE. I AM SO GLAD THAT NONE OF THE KIDS CAME TO THIS PART OF THE TRIAL, THEY HAVE ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH BESIDES LISTENING TO THINGS THEY DO NOT NEED TO KNOW YET.

I WILL BE SO HAPPY WHEN THIS PART IS OVER.

 

 

 

 

TODAY WAS A VERY LONG DAY I WAS AT COURT THE WHOLE ENTIRE DAY WHICH WAS THE CASE ALMOST THE WHOLE WEEK.

BUT TODAY WAS DIFFERENT, THEY ARE ALMOST DONE WITH TESTIMONY, AND THEN THE DEFENSE ATTORNEY WILL BE CALLING THEIR WITNESSES (IF ANY) AND THEIR CLIENT IF SHE WANTS TO TESTIFY ON HER BEHALF. WHICH THE PROSECUTOR TOLD ME THAT THEY DID NOT THINK SHE WAS GOING TO GET ON THE STAND AND THEY DIDN'T THINK SHE HAD ANY WITNESSES.

SO NOW I HAVE TO SIT HERE ALL WEEKEND AND LET THESE SCENES RUN THRU MY HEAD OF EVERYTHING I HEARD ALL WEEK. I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL NEXT WEEK WHEN THIS IS OVER....

TODAY THE LAST 2 OR 3 WITNESSES GOT ON THE STAND AND TESTIFIED, AND THEN THE PROSECUTORS TALKED ABOUT WHAT WOULD HAPPEN NOW.

THEY EXPLAINED THAT THEY WOULD BE PREPARING THE CLOSING ARGUMENTS AND WOULD BE DELIVERING THEM TODAY AND THE JURY WOULD THEN BE DISMISSED TO DELIBERATE AND GO OVER THE EVIDENCE AND WHEN THEY WERE DONE THEY WOULD BE GIVING THE VERDICT.

THEY TOLD ME IT MAY BE A COUPLE OF HOURS OR A COUPLE OF DAYS. IT WAS REALLY HARD TO TELL. THEY SAID THEY WILL BE HERE AT 9am AND I COULD WAIT TO HEAR FROM THEM I DIDN'T HAVE TO COME UNTIL THEY CALLED ME, BUT I COULD NOT STAY AWAY, I HAD BEEN THERE TO SEE EVERYTHING SO FAR, THERE WAS NO WAY I WAS GOING TO MISS ANYTHING THAT WOULD BE GOING ON.

SO TODAY I GET TO THE COURT HOUSE AND SIT AND WAIT AROUND WITH THE KIDS, I REALLY DIDN'T WANT TO BRING THEM , BUT THEY ASKED TO BE HERE, THEY WANTED TO HEAR THE VERDICT BEING READ OFF.

SO WE JUST TRIED TO KEEP THEM AWAY FROM THE COURT AREA ALL DAY, SO THAT THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO SEE OR HEAR ANYTHING THAT ANYONE MIGHT SAY ABOUT THE COURT CASE.

WELL WE SAT THERE ALL DAY ANTICIPATING A VERDICT, BUT NO DECISION WAS MADE TODAY, SO WE COME BACK TOMORROW.

WELL WE ARRIVED BACK AT THE COURT HOUSE AND DECIDED TO SIT ON A DIFFERENT FLOOR, JUST BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO STIR UP ANY TROUBLE, ESPECIALLY WITH A VERDICT SO CLOSE TO BE DETERMINED.

SO ABOUT 10am THE PROSECUTOR CAME AND FOUND ME AND SHE HAD THE FUNNIEST LOOK ON HER FACE AND SAID THE JURY HAS A VERDICT READLY FOR US. SHE REALLY SCARED ME BY THE LOOK ON HER FACE AND I ASKED IF SHE KNEW WHAT IT WAS, SHE SAID NO I DON'T KNOW UNTIL YOU DO.

WELL THIS WAS THE MOST STRESSFULL TIME, I THINK WE ONLY HAD TO WAIT MAYBE A HALF HOUR, BUT IT SEEMED LIKE WE WAITED FOR HOURS, FOR THE JURY TO COME OUT AND READ THE VERDICT.

WHEN THEY CAME OUT I WAS SO SCARED AND SHAKING SO BAD I COULD NOT SIT STILL. THE JURY FORMAN GAVE THE VERDICT TO THE BALIFF AND THE BALIFF HANDED IT TO THE JUDGE AND THE JUDGE READ OFF THE FIRST CHARGE AND SAID WE THE JURY FIND THE DEFENDANT GUILTY OF FELONIOUS ASSAULT..... THEN THE JUDGE READ OFF THE NEXT CHARGE AND SAID WE THE JURY FIND THE DEFENDANT GUILTY OF MURDER.....

OH MY GOD..........

I WAS SO HAPPY AND SAD AND SHOCKED AND RELIEVED..I HAD SO MANY EMOTIONS GOING ON AT ONCE IT WAS HARD TO TELL WHAT I WAS FEELING.I JUST KNOW THAT I WAS HAPPY.

THEN THE JUDGE DID SOMETHING I DID NOT EXPECT, HE DECIDED HE WAS GOING TO SENTENCE HER ON THE SPOT. HE ASKED IF ANY FAMILY MEMBER WANTED TO SAY ANYTHING, SO I GOT UP TO SPEAK, I WAS TOTALLY THROWN OFF AND REALLY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY, BUT LET THE JUDGE KNOW THE THINGS I WANTED HIM TO CONSIDER WHILE HE WAS DETERMINING HER SENTENCE AND I HOPED THAT IT WAS APPROPRIATE FOR THE CRIME THAT SHE COMMITTED AND WAS CONVICTED OF.

FINALLY AFTER 1 YEAR AND 1 MONTH AND 24 DAYS AFTER BRUCE WAS MURDERED, I FINALLY FEEL LIKE I SAW TO IT THAT THESE INDIVIDUALS PAID THE PRICE FOR THEIR CRIMES.

TODAY WAS BRUCES' 36th BIRTHDAY, I WISH HE WERE HERE TO CELEBRATE IT WITH US.

I DREAMED OF BRUCE THIS MORNING....

I THINK I JUST HAD SO MUCH ON MY MIND AND BRANDON WENT TO A HAUNTED HOUSE LAST NIGHT AND I KNEW TODAY WAS BRUCES BIRTHDAY....

I DREAMED THAT I WENT TO A HAUNTED HOUSE THAT WAS LIKE AN AMUSEMENT PARK THAT HAD HALLOWEEN STUFF GOING ON.

WELL ANYWAY, WE WERE ON A ROLLERCOSTER AND THEN A COFFIN STARTED COMING DOWN THE TRACK AND EVERYONE GOT SCARED AND RAN AWAY EXCEPT FOR ME, I JUST STOOD THERE. WHEN THE COFFIN GOT ALL THE WAY DOWN THE TRACK IT WAS RIGHT BESIDE ME AND I LOOKED OVER THE SIDE AND I SAW BRUCES FACE, AND I WAS SO UPSET AND MAD THAT SOMEONE WOULD DO THAT TO ME, I STARTED CRYING AND THEN BRUCE RAISED UP AND CAME OVER TO ME, AND I WAS IN SHOCK I COULDN'T MOVE AND THINGS WERE GOING THROUGH MY HEAD ABOUT HOW THIS COULD BE HAPPENING.

BRUCE HUGGED ME AND TOLD ME TO STOP CRYING. I SAID WHY WOULD SOMEONE DO ME LIKE THIS, AND PLAY JOKES LIKE THIS IT WASN'T FUNNY....HE TOLD ME IT WAS REALLY HIM AND HE HADN'T DIED, HE SAD HE HAD TO FAKE HIS DEATH AND LEAVE US BEHIND, AND HE COULDN'T LIVE WITHOUT ME ANYMORE, AND HE CAME BACK TO GET ME AND THE KIDS TO GO WITH HIM.

THIS WAS PROBABLY ONE OF THE WORST DREAMS I HAVE HAD ABOUT BRUCE SINCE HE DIED. I HAVE ALWAYS HAD DREAMS ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM, BUT NEVER ANYTHING LIKE THIS. IT WAS SO REAL, AND THEN I HAD SO MANY THOUGHTS RUNNING THRU MY MIND ABOUT IF HE REALLY DID DIE OR NOT.

WELL WHEN I AM TRYING TO GET SOME KIND OF NORMALNESS GOING ON IN MY LIFE, I GET A LETTER TODAY TELLING ME THAT THE APPEAL PROCESS FOR THE WOMAN INVOLVED HAS STARTED, AND THEY WILL LET ME KNOW WHEN AND WHERE THE APEAL CASE WILL BE HEARD......

I DIDN'T THINK THERE WOULD BE ANYTHING GOING ON FOR A WHILE. BUT I TALKED TO THE PROSECUTOR AND HE SAID THAT THEY HAVE A SMALL AMOUNT OF TIME TO FILE THE APPEAL AND THEN THEY GET EVERYTHING TOGETHER AND GO BEFORE THE APPEALANTE JUDGES AND THE 3 OF THEM EITHER OVERTURN (THROW IT OUT) THE JUDGEMENT OR AFIRM IT (KEEP IT THE SAME).

I HATE THIS...THIS MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO GO THRU THIS WHOLE THING AGAIN AND I HAVEN'T EVEN HAD TIME TO GET OVER THIS LEG OF THE COURT PROCESS.

THE PROSECUTOR SAID IT WOULD PROBABLY BE NEXT YEAR SOMETIME AT LEAST MAY OR EVEN AFTER THAT. SO ATLEAST THAT MAKES ME FEEL BETTER.